Unicorn: A single woman interested in sex with couples.

Are you a couple thinking about having a threesome with a Unicorn (a single woman who has sex with couples)?

Maybe you’ve watched threesome porn together or thought about going to a sex club or putting up an ad online to find a third. If you’ve ever rubbed or buzzed one out to threesome fantasies, you’ll want to read on.

As a card carrying Unicorn, I enjoy being a part of the affection of a couple and hottness of a threesome, but getting to the hottness can be challenging. Lemme help you out Unicorn-seeking Couples….

Here are 5 Ways to Attract a Unicorn:

1. Decide what you want and like before nekkid time. 

Dirty talking about a third during sex is a lot different than unpacking the logistics and emotions that need to be in place for a hot threesome in reality. Talk to your partner about what turns you on about adding another woman into your twosome. If it’s your first time having group sex, check out my Top 5 Myths About Group Sex and 3 Awkward Threesome Moments.

Discuss:

  • What kinds of scenes do you fantasize about with more than two women present?
  • What kinds of things do you want this sexy trio to do?
  • What are your buzz kills? (things that aren’t hard limits, but don’t make you go splooooosh)
  • What kind of unicorn are you looking for? (e.g. bisexual, kinky, dominant/submissive, sensual etc.)
  • Is there anything that makes you nervous? (e.g. jealousy, performance anxiety, body insecurity, a giant zit etc.)
  • Use communication as your first lube of the night.

2. Go to Unicorn Night at Oasis Aqualounge

Oasis Aqualounge is a water themed adult playground in downtown Toronto. The beautiful venue and awesome staff create a clothing-optional environment where you can choose to explore your sexuality. Unicorn Night is where couples and single females mingle to make some hot magic happen. It's a busy, flirty and friendly evening that happens once a month.

 

Oasis is a fantastic place for couples and Unicorns mingling because it is blooming with social spaces to mingle nude and semi-nude. Unlike other clubs that have a dance floor/club area and then a separate play area, Oasis’s layout and spa facilities (e.g. hot tub, sauna and heated outdoor pool!) create nooks and crannies that feel welcoming, friendly and way less awkward than your eighth grade dance.

There is no pressure to get involved - you may decide to go for an evening to be voyeurs or exhibitionists or have same room sex as other groups or even just to mingle in lingerie and a towel, building up your confidence as sexy Unicorn Hunters. (Check out my lovely, sexy friend Red Hot Suz's first time at Oasis Aqualounge's Unicorn Night.

Getting out into the community isn’t a guarantee you’ll attract a unicorn for your threesome magic - but it does make you more visible in the community. Get out, meet people who have similar interests to you and talk to other couples. Increase your feeling of belonging in a space where you can potentially actualize your fantasies. #GoGoUnicornHunters

3. Engage, instead of objectifying, your Unicorn

I've had couples make me feel like an object from the moment they approached me.

 

While the attention can be flattering for an elusive sexual partner like a Unicorn, it can also make you feel like a stunt vagina. Some Unicorns may really enjoy just being an extra body for the carnal, primal heat of it. Many Unicorns want to feel sexually stimulated in mind and body, regardless if it's for one-night or on-going.

The desire of a couple has felt hottest for me when I have felt the seductive and flirty vibes from both partners and the peripheral high of their excitement to be doing this with each other. The most un-hottest Unicorn experiences I've had are where the couple is dealing with an insecurity they are either unaware of or ignoring. This usually manifests itself in a constant reinforcement from them of my place as an outsider in their relationship.

Engaging a Unicorn doesn't mean you want her permanently in the emotional sacredness of your relationship. It acknowledges her as an active participant in the threesome. It elevates her desires to the level of importance as yours. And it makes everyone feel luscious as fuck.

4. Be champions of Other People’s Pleasure (OPP)

Be a generous giver of pleasure.

 

How do you know what makes your unicorn feel good? Communicate curiously.

I’m a huge proponent of OPP for group sex, and sex in general. Couples can often get caught up in their fantasy of a Unicorn and forget that said Unicorn isn’t a fantasy, she's a real person with needs, desires and kinks of her own. It's not only the desires, expectations and style of the couple that matters. Learn about the Unicorns you are approaching or who approach you by being curious.

Work these questions into conversation:

  • What turns you on?
  • How do you like to be touched?
  • Do you like [insert sexy thing here]?
  • I really like to eat ass/kiss/snuggle/give oral/receive massages, how about you?
  • We’ve had a fantasy of another woman joining us for a long time ever since we started dirty talking about it, what made you curious about being a Unicorn?
  • We really like it when everyone takes a turn being the center of attention. If you were at the centre of our attention right now, what sexy things would you like us to do to you?
  • My partner is a really loud moaner when they get super aroused, what do you sound and look like when you’re really turned on?
  • We know that not every unicorn is bisexual, how do you like to play with each person in a couple?

Look. Listen. Learn. Group sex means more bodies and more emotions. You aren’t responsible for OPP, but you are responsible for contributing to an environment where OPP is paramount. Make it safe for people to have the kind of sex they want in your fantasy.

5. Cultivate Consent

 

Consent should be on-going, enthusiastic and clear. Consent isn't just the absence of an outright 'No'. For many threesomes, you are all relatively new to each other and haven't yet learned what it looks like, sounds like and feels like when your partners are having a good time.

If you are lucky enough to charm a Unicorn into your bed, continue with OPP during your threesome. Make her feel welcome, desired and continually engage her in consent regularly throughout your sexy time. Making assumptions about what’s pleasurable for someone is not only not-cool, but also makes a Unicorn get her guard up having to watch as you continually test her boundaries instead of asking.

  • Check your assumptions by asking questions. Is your Unicorn bisexual? What does her bisexuality look like in a threesome? What does her bisexuality look like with you two?
  • What are your Unicorn's hard limits? Things that are completely off the table.
  • What are your Unicorn's buzz kills? Things that kill the mood for her.
  • Does your Unicorn have a safe word she wants to use?
  • Is there anything in your dynamic as a couple that may trigger the Unicorn? Discuss kinks and fetishes ahead of time. Even if your Unicorn won't participate in them, ask about consent for being a voyeur to it.
  • Is there anything physically or emotionally going on for your Unicorn that you need to be aware of to make the threesome safe, pleasurable and consensual for all?

Get your Unicorn game on folks. Happy Humping.

 

Ready for some practical threesome tips?
Check out my How to Have a Threesome On-demand Webinar or book a one-on-one Pleasure Coaching Session.

 

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