What is rimming?
Rimming is the act of giving oral sex to the butthole.
Busting Rimming Myths
There’s a lot of shame around sex and sexual activities. The erotic activities you enjoy don’t say anything about you as a person, unless you want them to! The messages around anal hygiene we have learned as part of personal sanitation habits are important. In an erotic context, the butthole gets an erogenous opportunity, and both giver and receiver get to decide what is comfortable, sexy and safe for them.
It’s like you’re eating shit.
Butthole does have a unique flavour - but not in the way you’d imagine. If you can see or smell feces, the rimmie might need to freshen up with a shower or an enema. The taste of butthole is the taste of a warm, crevice of the body. Sometimes saltier or more intense than licking a forearm for example. If you’re not into the taste, have some fun with a flavoured lube (so many to choose from: shop USD / CAD) or use a barrier like a dental dam.
Hairy buttholes are unhygienic.
A shaved asshole might experience more sensitivity to stimulation, but a hairy asshole is not more hygienic or more desirable.
Techniques for rimming
- Make out with the butthole - kiss it, suck it, tease it.
- Tongue the folds - the crinkles of the anus have lots of nerve endings and fill up with blood as the body of the rimmie gets more aroused and relaxed. Use your tongue to create circles around them
- Use more than your tongue - try using other parts of your face like your nose or chin
- Give pleasure to surrounding anal areas - lick the butt crack, use a toy or your other hand to stimulate the perineum, lower back, genitals
- Flat tongue lapping - lap in upward strokes with your flat tongue, pushing slowly against the anus as you lap up towards the crack or genitals
- Accenting - use your tongue to create emphasis on a part of the rotation, the top and bottom of the asshole (towards the belly button and towards the back) are extra sensitive to stimulation so putting emphasis here can mean a little move with your tongue but big impact for the butthole
- Try a position like face sitting or on all fours where the rimmie can masturbate their anus on the rimmer's face by grinding on a nose, mouth or chin to get the kind of rhythm and pressure that feels good for their body
- Experiment with speed, direction and pressure. Allow for consistency and rhythm of one technique before moving to the next - ask the rimmie if they want it faster or slower, harder or softer, so you can get feedback and adjust to their pleasure.
- Luna Matatas
Best positions to get rimmed in.
Find positions that are comfortable for both the receiver and the giver - you want the receiver to be able to relax into the sensations, and the giver to feel comfortable to give continuous stimulation.
On your back, legs spread
If your rimming receiver is comfortable on their back with their legs spread, use a pillow or sex wedge (I like this one USD / CAD) to prop up their pelvis so the rim giver doesn't tire out their neck at a strenuous angle.
Head down, ass up
The rimmie head down ass up gives both people free hands to play with other parts of the body like nipples or genitals (their own or their partner's).
Face sitting is also fun to explore and can be both exciting and challenging for giver and receiver. Prop up the rimmer's head with a pillow to bring their face closer to the anus and the rimmer can use a bed or a wall to help balance their weight off their knees and thighs.
Lying flat on stomach, legs parted
A great beginner position is rimmie on their stomach with their legs spread and rimmer using their hands or forearms to spread ass cheeks and expose the butthole.
How do you prepare for rimming?
You have options - for some washing the external anal area, especially with a spray shower head. You can add a gentle/mild soap if the area isn't prone to irritation. Other people prefer to use douching shower attachments or enema bulbs with warm water (no solutions - they can irritate and dry out the anus, making it prone to micro-tears).
If you have issues like IBS or hemorrhoids, listen to your body - some days will be better for rimming than others.
If you're just getting right down to things, you can do a visual and sniff test and communicate. Ask your person if they want to get their butthole ready for your mouth or if they need to 'freshen up'. For rimmie's, you can also ask your rimmer if they want to use a barrier or if they'd like you to freshen up before then dine on your butthole.
Risks of rimming are similar to other oral sex activities that expose you to potential bacterial STIs. Whether you have a penis or a vulva, you want to keep butt bacteria in the butt area. Butt bacteria can potentially cause UTIs when transferred by fingers, tongues or toys to genitals and into the urinary tract or vagina.
Minimize the risk by using barriers like condoms, dental dams or latex/nitrile gloves (you can find some here). Rimming can also run the risk of transferring harmful gut bacteria, like e-coli or salmonella to the rimmie from the rimmer. If your rimmie is having an upset stomach kind of day, put off rimming for another day. If the rimmie has had a good wash after their last bowel movement and you're using latex or nitrile gloves, the risks of things like pink eye goes down. Using dental dams as an oral barrier reduces the risks even further.
Want to give the pleasure of rimming but don't want the oral to anus experience?
Try the b-Vibe Rimming Butt Plug (my fav are from Wicked lubes, flavours from pink lemonade to salted caramel: shop USD / CAD) or vibrators (shop USD / CAD) on the outside of the anus to delight those sensitive nerve endings.
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